Welcome back to Mindful Monday.

Here is your second quote from my book Little Pocket of Love:

“Acceptance seems unachievable when you are in pain. And for some people, they live and die never accepting what has happened. And that’s a tragedy in itself. You now have a chance to learn to accept the past, to grow and to move on. You are here, so now nothing can stop you. “

When we grieve, we are dragged into the darkest room, the loneliest path and the most painful place. We miss who we have lost and what we have lost. They say acceptance is the final stage of the grieving process but when you are sad, angry and depressed, you cannot see straight or think rationally.

The thought of acceptance does not even exist. How can you accept what has happened to you?

But you can and you will, if you want too. You have a choice in this and all that you do.

You need patience and time. Time is not a healer but you need time to heal.

Think of the person you have loved and lost? Do you think they would want you to be grieving and not living? Some people never accept a loss and spend their entire lives in pain.

You don’t have to be that person. You can wake up some day and decide, enough is enough. I want to be free, I want to live again and I want to love and be loved.

For years, I could not see the light or even comprehend it. But I took my time and I had to learn to be gentle with myself, be kind to my body and my mind. I had to learn to smile without guilt, laugh without fear and love without pain.

During my darkest days, I pushed my friends away, I was lonely, I was angry and I had lost my sparkle. It was no way to live. I was merely surviving. I remember one day realising that I didn’t want a life like this. I wanted the fun loving, free spirited Meghann back.

With therapy, reading, writing and listening to my body and my mind, cracks began to appear in the great big wall I had built around myself. The light started to creep through the crevices. I started to see again beyond the bricks and mortar. I could see colour again. And the more I saw, the more I wanted to see. So I kept going and persevering. I had started knocking this wall and I was not giving up even if the task was surmountable. Friends and family were there to help me when I felt I couldn’t carry on. And together, we did it. And then I could step over what was left of the wall and carry on with my life. It’s a journey I am on but I’ve left the stone, cement and those broken and rusty tools behind me because I do not need to build a wall again, I do not want to be alone in the dark.

Your wall can come down, you just need to believe in yourself and your abilities.

Meghann x 

Little Pocket of Love is available here: https://www.bookhubpublishing.com/product/little-pocket-of-love/

• I am not a psychologist or therapist, I am a girl sharing my own story that may resonate with you and help you along your own journey. Seek professional help, it’s the best investment you can make.